Monday, December 2, 2013

The whole world is wrong


I have been doing a lot of thinking about where my life is headed, who I am and who I am becoming. As I saw photos of some acquaintances out and about, in a large group of people, all "bonding", I asked myself if I was not missing out on something.

If I am not out and about with a bunch of people, doing "stuff" together, am I missing out on life? I think this is one of the most contentious topics for me in my introversion... And truth is, I am not.

I am not missing out on life and it is perfectly fine to want to be home reading a good book, or just spending time with my hubby and my dogs, or just by myself with my thoughts.


It was right then I realized that maybe, just maybe, what people call sensitivity, my anxiety, are really not the problem. The issue is the world is not built for people like me. The world is no longer designed for the thinkers and loners.

Do you really think the likes of Plato, da Vinci would have been able to come up with so much thought process, theories, manifestos if they were doing the 9 to 5, maybe taking 1 or 2 weeks off a year, and doing a lot of thinking in a 'collaboration' environment with a lot of togetherness? I didn't think so.

I am not saying great ideas have not been born of collaboration and team work (2 business concepts I really dislike), but some great concepts would never been born in such environment.

So that's it. There are so many labels to categorize people who don't fit in all this togetherness, collaboration, team work, no alone time environment. And these labels were invented just because well, we are supposed to conform.

So what I say? Conform no more! Be bold, be silly, be weird, be crazy, but be you. So when you look in the mirror, you recognize yourself.

“I think the reward for conformity is that everyone likes you except yourself.” 
― Rita Mae Brown

31 comments:

Middle Girl said...

One of the comments to an on-line article, "How Introverts Can Stand Out At Work" I read recently, questioned why the rest of the world think that we have a problem.

Indeed. Be yourself. Day in, day out.

Jeanie said...

I'm not sure I agree. I don't see the world as anti-introvert. I see it as a place where those who need to be out there can and those who can't or choose not to don't need to be. Speaking as one who is happier with a book or my computer than doing the circuit (and I did the circuit for a lot of years when working) I can tell you that the time I could do things on my own, independently, were the most productive and most recognized. So I say "do your thing" and do it right and well. The rest will fall into place and YOU will be happy.

Creatively yours Fi said...

ooooh I love the quote :) Too true Ana xX

GlorV1 said...

Hi Ana. Hope your THX was great. I enjoyed this post because it reminds me of me. I stay home because I want to. I don't hang out elsewhere but my home with my hubby and family pet members. I'm right there with you and life is great for me, hope it is for you to doing your thing. Take care.

jinxxxygirl said...

Gosh you know i wonder about this so much..... it seems people no longer have any down time.... I know this is not exactly what you were talking about but i don't think people ever 'turn it off' any more.... or are alone with their own thoughts... how many opportunities has the recent generations missed because the Great Thinkers were busy texting or googling or watching some inane stupid comedy on their phone or ipad or whatever..... We need some more Thinkers thinking cause honey we got some big problems out there that need fixing...... :) Hugs! deb

foxysue said...

Love the quote too Anna, yes follow your heart, let others follow theirs we all have a place....x

ANN ALICIA LAUGH said...

As xtravert I also love moments where I am alone writing painting ...and some others where I collaborate with people its depend of my mood of the moment don't worry about that real understanding people won't juge you!

(At that time I struggle a lot against anxiety ...and so on )

Japolina said...

This is what is really bad about social media. I too sometimes think that I am being lame by not being out and about all of the time like my Facebook "friends" but the truth is that when I am out and having a good time, I never stop to think "let's post this on Facebook!" In fact, In all of the family and social events that I have been to in the past three months, I haven't stopped to do that once because I am living life at the time.

Keep on doing what makes you happy!
Check out my blog this week for my first giveaway ever! http://japolina.blogspot.com/2013/12/contest-giveaway-yipeee.html

Optimistic Existentialist said...

I most definitely don't think that you're missing out on things by not being out doing stuff. I happen to be quite happy being an introvert :)

Jess said...

The world needs people like us! Thankyou for writing about this subject that I often worry about too. I know as a human race people achieve so much as a group, our food production, the buildings we live in but not all of us feel at ease in a group and I never have. This is something I still think about and sometimes wish I was like other people but the truth is I'm not and I'm so glad to have read this today. Thankyou Ana.
Jess xx

AntiquityTravelers said...

I start to short-circuit when I don't get alone time. There is only so much I can take of 'being on' in a crowd. I prefer being alone where I feel productive

That doesn't mean I don't like seeing friends, hanging with friends, talking .... but there is an important word in there ... 'friends' I have a handful of true friends that I could talk to about anything, everything and nothing. or just be. And the older I get the more I feel like I'm wasting my time with the 'niceties' of social conversation

Elena said...

I ignore labels. We're not all created alike. I think it's all about balance. We work/play together and we need alone time, that connection to self. Loving your words and work Ana!

Unknown said...

I am right there with you. I am completely satisfied by myself...and, that is A-ok with me. Thanks for the post.

Shaharoh said...

Me time is crucial for me. And I can hang with a group but I feel like afterward, I'm drained and need to recharge my batteries. Something my mom says that makes me laugh is "Stay home, save money!" - it's true!

Made.by.Fay said...

For me, Solitude = Survival. I do need connection and bonding, but not in large groups. One on one is great. And I need more solitude time between connection, to have the energy for the connecting. The problem comes with the fact that usually, we accomplish things in connection with others. We each have to find our own balance of connection and solitude to stay true to ourselves and also accomplish the thing we have to offer the world. It's a continual balancing act for me. Good luck with your continued artistic journey.
Fay

Melissa said...

I think my comments are very much echoed by Jeanie so I won't repeat them.

The key is staying true to yourself. I think it was harder when I was younger (eg going with the crowd) but this is one of the great things about growing older - you know there's only so much time & energy left so you spend less time worrying about what others think. Let's just spend it the way you want to!

Have fun! ;-)

Magic Love Crow said...

I agree, Be You!!! Great post ;o)

The Dancing Crone said...

Yes I want to recognize myself when I look in the mirror! What a wonderful way to describe being true to yourself, Ana. And I doo like the looks of the project you are working on!!

Plowing Through Life (Martha) said...

Just do your thing and don't worry about what others think. This will become more and more your motto as you get older. You can't be someone that the world expects you to be; you'll never be happy that way.

Palomasea said...

Love that quote, dear Ana...and wow, does this post ever resonate with me.
I think about this all the time...(maybe too much!) You are so right, though, as long as we accept (and hopefully love) who we are...and ask ourselves whether what we are doing makes us happy...

Beautiful painting.... :)
Blessings,
- Irina

Riot Kitty said...

So well said! And I love the quote.

I'm an introvert as well, and need a lot of alone time. Otherwise I burn out.

Ariel said...

Enjoyed this post so much Ana.
Susan

Kyra Wilson said...

I'm meant to be on my own for the most part, but sometimes I do get lonely. Sometimes I do feel like I'm being left behind or missing out. My guess is that it's more about balancing what you need, than the demand you do it. In other words, like you said, be yourself. :)

Brig said...

What a great post, I'm one of those that is often thought of as needing to be surrounded by others, it's not so. I need most to have alone time to ponder.

Willow said...

Here, here and cheers ~ said this nonconformist :)

~Lavender Dreamer~ said...

Keep enjoying your art and being the sweet authentic person you are! We love you! Sweet hugs!

Way Out Wear said...

Well said. I agree we must be our authentic selves, good things follow when we are not conforming to others but when we are authentic.

Irene said...

I guess the most important thing is to accept ourselves for who we are then the rules imposed by society wouldn't matter that much. Easier said than done because I learned it the hard way. But it is the only way to peace.

Irene said...

Beautiful art, by the way. :-)

Annette said...

always enjoy seeing what you are up to and have to say. I have my own drummer in life and am quite happy about it. So just be true to yourself and you will be happy and not to worry about labels. Just be Ana. xoxoxo Just Annette

CraveCute said...

Your art always makes me happy... now be who you are and don't worry about others!