Sunday, June 3, 2012

I am good enough

In my freshman year, most of us who chose Psychology as our major had this little hidden fascination with Freud. Sure I started thinking the man was a little off by my sophomore year, but one thing that stayed with me was his theory of psychological projection as a form of self defense.
You might wonder why I would think about this since I did not become a psychologist. But, so it happens I really dislike my company's new CFO. It is not a simple dislike...it is more a feeling of pure contempt. I find him to be conceited, pompous, and condescending.
If Freud is right, then my feelings of contempt are really not about him, but about me. There is something about this individual that makes me feel as though I have the brain of an ameba. I know that life is more important than this person. I also know that in the big scheme of the universe, he really is insignificant. But I find important to question why it is so hard to live by Eleanor Roosevelt's advice and know "No one can make [me] feel inferior without [my] consent."

21 comments:

Annette said...

Love your art work and like what Eleanor says better. sorry you missed the giveaway. I am getting close to 100 followers and will have another one then. xoxox

StephanieD said...

I love that quote by Eleanor Roosevelt (which reminds me that reading her biography is on my to-do list). That's a powerful way of getting to the root of your contempt. If you do find out that your feelings are about you and not him, will your dislike of him cease?

June said...

Another thoughtful and meaningful post Ana, and one that resonates with me deeply. Beautiful painting, too - beautiful, bright, vivid, life-affirming colours.

Selene said...

thank you for the comment...
really lovely blog!

http://hipandchips.blogspot.it/

alteredstatesstudio said...

love the paintings- the colors are fantastic! and, maybe he is insecure of a bright, thoughtful, well spoken woman and only knows how to be an ass. ;)

Sherri B. said...

That Eleanor Roosevelt quote is one of my favorites...and one of the hardest to live by. I often wonder why people like your boss are put into our lives. Their thorns are so sharp and uncomfortable to our psyche! I hope you can endure and figure out a way to not let him effect you...I'm sending encouraging thoughts! Thanks so much for commenting on my beach photo - my vacation was so wonderful and de-stressing. Oh, and your paintings are so beautiful!! Have a good Monday! :)

Jo said...

Those who put others down are usually insecure themselves... I do love this post's artwork!! You are talented!

Jane said...

Not sure why, but some people seem to magnify our insecurities. It doesn't help when it's obvious they feel they are intrinsically better/smarter etc. I have people in my family like that and I have chosen to ignore them completely. Much harder when it's a co-worker - sometimes it's almost unbearable. Hopefully he'll move on to another position - soon.

Michelle said...

I love your closing quote...so true. I needed to hear that today. Thanks.

Elena said...

Great artwork! And awesome post. I run into similar type people and then wonder what is it about them that is being mirrored back to me to see/learn from. It's hard as I'd rather punch said mirror in the nose (teehee)but when you can look at it... hmmm. Hmmm been saying hmmm alot. Alot to ponder these days it seems. Awesome post (again).

Francie said...

Your art work brings me a lot of peace. And I must say I had forgotten about Freud's 'projection' theory and how excited I was when I first came across it so many decades ago. You know I'm not so sure I agree totally with Mrs. R. Social conditioniong begins far to early for females. If we start feeling bad because we think we've somehow agreed to it we may never find equality and justice... in my opinion :)

Zena said...

Beautiful art, I still am fascinated by some of Freud ideas and think they can be significant nowadays, even when Freud´s whole theories have not aged so well. The idea of projection is one of this ideas and it´s often related to jungian shadow. According to this we are prone to attribute unacceptable wishes or behavior to others that are our own.

But I think this is also a way to become aware of our tendencies and our potential weak points, those which are not present yet but can create unbalance in our lives in the future. From this viewpoint projection can be a sort of advice or warning about ourselves.

I have found that some of the persons who cause me this reaction are fanatic people, I don´t consider me to be fanatic (indeed, I hate fanatism) but I am a strict and severe, very passionate about my believes -like most of them- so I have to be watchful and keep my compassion alive if I don´t want to take that path, when I project I remember (once again) the great importance of this

Ariel said...

Love this free painting Ana.After reading your post I suddenly remembered that I had written the same quote in one of my old journals.Loved your previous post as well. That butterfly is stunning and what you have written is so thought-provoking.
Susan

La Dolce Vita said...

Love the beautiful colors of this painting , really gives good vibes!
As for Freud's theory and your boss, I can say that people whom we do not like, they often project our innermost fears ! For example if a boss is the dominating / rude /cold type, we often feel that our submissive/ introvert/ passive/ calm / warm type of nature will be sabotaged by him. We feel very uncomfortable by the opposite, especially if the opposite quality is a negative one. It is always a cold war going on between the two opposing nature/personalities- i.e. you and your boss.
The only way out is to rise above the situation and stop looking at yourself as a mere 'subordinate' and stop giving importance to the boss as someone very "powerful"
(more powerful than God sometimes!)
Sometimes, by going beyond the roles we play helps. For instance, if you stop identifying yourself by the social roles you play- and think of yourself as a child of the universe" rather than " a mere subordinate of your boss", -then you might be able to be more at peace.
Secondly, remember that every one of us is at a specific level in the ladder of out spiritual growth. Maybe your boss is at the lowest rung in the ladder of his spiritual evolution and so he cannot give you good vibes or behave in a manner that makes him likeable. Maybe he is not even aware of what he is doing to you because of his slow spiritual evolution. On the other hand, you are higher up in the spiritual ladder and therefore, you can discriminate between good and bad vibes. You are more aware than him,
- I hope that I was able to explain my views on this subject :-)
Love and hugs,
Sanghamitra

geetlee said...

Gosh, so true!! I relate to your thoughts completely.
I love your photos too.. it seems that you are on Instagram. I'd love to be friends (@gitanjali)
xo

Introverted Art said...

You ladies are amazing! Each one of your comments added such insight to my view on this subject and have deeply helped me.

Denise Mulligan said...

I just had a similar problem, feeling like someone was "making me feel guilty" to do something. I finally remembered that no one person can make me feel anything. It is my choice how I feel. Attitude is everything! Feel good, you are an amazing, sensitive and kind person. What could be better than that?
Enjoy the precious life that you are given and let the negative people live in their own made hell.

Plowing Through Life (Martha) said...

Conceited, pompous, and condescending...three traits that I detest, and three traits that stir emotions in me the way they do in you. I do find that many times I can rise above this by simply ignoring the individual or avoiding them completely, but it's harder when that option is not that easy. I really like La Dolce Vita's comment; it makes a lot of sense. Aggressive personalities shake my foundation. Sometimes I do feel as though their approach will sabotage my quiet, peaceful nature.

Introverted Art said...

oh Martha, like you aggressive personalities really affect me...

laurie said...

they say everyone we meet in our life journey we meet for a reason, if that is so then this may also explain it, he's here to teach you something or maybe you he,
the quote rings true,
beautiful watercolor, just amazing color,

Christine said...

I love your loose hand ~ beautiful work. Thanks so much for stopping by and commenting on my blog. The photo is a cottonwood seed :)